The lawyer and the devil

[Valigator]

The devil visited a lawyer's office and made him an offer. "I can arrange some things for you, " the devil said. "I'll increase your income five-fold. Your partners will love you; your clients will respect you; you'll have four months of vacation each year and live to be a hundred. All I require in return is that your wife's soul, your children's souls, and their children's souls rot in hell for eternity."

The lawyer thought for a moment. "What's the catch?" he asked.
:D :D :p

[fabsroman]

Now that is a new one. Kind of funny, but not really. I guess I am just not in a good mood because I have a ton of work to do tonight, including some stuff on a divorce wherein I think my client and his wife are out of their minds.

Attorneys don't start out as bad as we end up. We come out of law school as nice human beings. However, after being subjected to our clients for decades, we have to develop a thick skin and love for money. If we didn't love the money, we wouldn't have any clients, and you guys always want to sue somebody.

[Valigator]

Speak for your clients, not for the rest of us......

[fabsroman]

Val,

You mean to tell me that you can honestly say you have never sought the services of an attorney. Maybe not to sue somebody, but probably to look over something. Never been through a divorce or bought a house I take it, because most people use attorneys for that stuff. How about drafting wills, advanced health care directives, and powers of attorney?

Today's society is one where most people need attorneys for something or another eventually. My cousin, who isn't the least bit litigious, called me yesterday wanting to know if he had a case against a dealership that sold him a brand new Mustang GT with body damage on it without disclosing it. There is a lot of the "screw them" attitude in today's society, and I am surprised that you have never had to deal with it, or if you did, that you never had to use the services of an attorney.

[Valigator]

Oh no your not pullin me into that one...you specifically said "you guys always want to sue somebody" I quote from your post...

I dont have problems with lawyers, they know I hate them and dont trust anything they do when I walk in the door...they dont tell me what they are gonna charge, I tell them what I am prepared to pay, and anything over that jepordizes their mothers health...and or any paint jobs they may have on their cars,,,,.subsequently I have a good relationship with all my attorneys.......

;)

[fabsroman]

I would kick a client like you out the door, or you would be fired within a month of representation. LOL Had to fire a couple of clients in my 4 years on my own, but they were such a headache it was well worth the lost client.

[skeet]

I hate to admit that Fabs is right. We really do need lawyers...but the lawyers have made themselves necessary by having laws passed so that they are necessary..... And then there are the ATTORNEYS...(big difference you know). :D :D

[Valigator]

Fabs you gotta get a little thicker skin sweetie....you know we arent talkin about you......but like I said my attornies love me....we have more personal and recreational relationships than business......my lawyers are trained....and that took years...so I usually use the same guys depending on the situation...
and they love to hear from me, by the way.....
but do you notice the mindset Fabs???
"or you would be fired within a month of representation"

"fired" not dissolve the relationship" not "sever the relationship" but fired...funny lawyers think they are the only ones who can get paid by other party, dissolve the relationship because of differences and decide they "fired" the client.....kinda arrogant dont you think....
PS here is one of my lawyers,
http://pic20.picturetrail.com/VOL11/876226/11349729/137474150.jpg

:p

[fabsroman]

And should we also say that clients are arrogant when they say they fired their attorney or accountant. The shoe can go on the other foot too. How many people have you ever heard say "I dissolved my relationship with my attorney." I would guess zero. So, all clients are arrogant, just as all attorneys are arrogant.


By the way, I rarely ever hug a client. The only client I have ever hugged was a woman after her brother was sentenced to a month in jail and she was crying. I don't kiss any of my clients' asses. I do my job and usually that is good enough. If I wasn't busy, then maybe I would kiss some ass, but I still doubt it.

As far as my skin is concerned, it is pretty thick. My family is pretty tough, from my parents down to my youngest sister who is 9 years younger than me.

[Valigator]

A man walked into a bar with his alligator and asked the bartender,
"Do you serve lawyers here?".
"Sure do," replied the bartender.
"Good," said the man. "Give me a beer, and I'll have a lawyer for
my 'gator.";)

[fabsroman]

Now that one I haven't heard before. I'll have to remember it for tomorrow night's dinner.

[catdaddy]

i thought a lawyer and the devil were the same thing